{"id":4117,"date":"2022-03-07T12:23:00","date_gmt":"2022-03-07T12:23:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/terezrijkenberg.com\/?p=4117"},"modified":"2022-05-21T12:41:56","modified_gmt":"2022-05-21T12:41:56","slug":"do-you-talk-to-yourself-its-a-sign-of-success","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/terezrijkenberg.com\/blog\/do-you-talk-to-yourself-its-a-sign-of-success\/","title":{"rendered":"Do you talk to yourself? It&#8217;s a sign of success"},"content":{"rendered":"\t\t<div data-elementor-type=\"wp-post\" data-elementor-id=\"4117\" class=\"elementor elementor-4117\" data-elementor-post-type=\"post\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-120bddb9 elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"120bddb9\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-settings=\"{&quot;dotlife_ext_is_background_parallax&quot;:&quot;false&quot;}\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-5ee85833\" data-id=\"5ee85833\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-settings=\"{&quot;dotlife_ext_link_sidemenu&quot;:&quot;false&quot;,&quot;dotlife_ext_is_scrollme&quot;:&quot;false&quot;,&quot;dotlife_ext_is_smoove&quot;:&quot;false&quot;,&quot;dotlife_ext_is_parallax_mouse&quot;:&quot;false&quot;,&quot;dotlife_ext_is_infinite&quot;:&quot;false&quot;,&quot;dotlife_ext_is_fadeout_animation&quot;:&quot;false&quot;}\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-2425e678 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"2425e678\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-settings=\"{&quot;dotlife_ext_link_sidemenu&quot;:&quot;false&quot;,&quot;dotlife_ext_is_scrollme&quot;:&quot;false&quot;,&quot;dotlife_ext_is_smoove&quot;:&quot;false&quot;,&quot;dotlife_ext_is_parallax_mouse&quot;:&quot;false&quot;,&quot;dotlife_ext_is_infinite&quot;:&quot;false&quot;,&quot;dotlife_ext_is_fadeout_animation&quot;:&quot;false&quot;}\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t<style>\/*! elementor - v3.20.0 - 13-03-2024 *\/\n.elementor-widget-text-editor.elementor-drop-cap-view-stacked .elementor-drop-cap{background-color:#69727d;color:#fff}.elementor-widget-text-editor.elementor-drop-cap-view-framed .elementor-drop-cap{color:#69727d;border:3px solid;background-color:transparent}.elementor-widget-text-editor:not(.elementor-drop-cap-view-default) .elementor-drop-cap{margin-top:8px}.elementor-widget-text-editor:not(.elementor-drop-cap-view-default) .elementor-drop-cap-letter{width:1em;height:1em}.elementor-widget-text-editor .elementor-drop-cap{float:left;text-align:center;line-height:1;font-size:50px}.elementor-widget-text-editor .elementor-drop-cap-letter{display:inline-block}<\/style>\t\t\t\t<pre>&lt;READING TIME: 3m06s&gt;<\/pre><p>Did you know that talking to yourself intentionally is a sign of SUCCESS!<\/p><p>Yes &#8211; talking to yourself is no longer seen as a sign of madness! (Whew! \ud83d\ude02)<\/p><p>In fact, when we speak to ourselves intentionally, we create confidence and self-trust.<\/p><p><strong>\u2753How do you currently speak to yourself?<\/strong><\/p><p><strong>\u2753What do you say to yourself when things don\u2019t go as planned?<\/strong><\/p><p><strong>\u2753What do you say to yourself when you create the results you want for yourself?<\/strong><\/p><p>Interestingly, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.gottman.com\/blog\/the-magic-relationship-ratio-according-science\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">research studies<\/a> in relationships show that couples who speak to each other with a Positive to Negative comment ratio of 4 : 5 (which means for every 4 positive comments they gave 5 negative ones &#8211; i.e. just 25% more negative comments) &#8211; most likely ended in divorce!<\/p><p>Those that shared 25 positive comments for every 5 negative comments (25 : 5) were in healthy relationships.<\/p><p>But there were also couples who spoke to each other with 100 positive comments to every 5 negative comments (100 : 5) who were in amazingly successful relationships.<\/p><p><strong>I\u2019m sharing this with you to ask you, what do you think your ratio of positive to negative comments is with yourself right now?<\/strong><\/p><p><em>Or do you think you&#8217;re on your way to a mental divorce (so to speak)?<\/em><\/p><p>And what ratio of positive to negative comments do you <strong>want<\/strong> to have to create an amazingly successful relationship with yourself?<\/p><p>The great news is if you want to speak more positively to yourself, then you can start to change your ratio, by first just becoming aware of the self-talk in your mind.<\/p><p>And when you hear a negative comment come up, you can train yourself to choose a different thought, one that will build that healthy and successful relationship you want with yourself.<\/p><h3 dir=\"ltr\">TAKE ACTION:<\/h3><ol><li>Start to become more aware of the self-talk in your mind<\/li><li>Notice when you&#8217;re mentally &#8220;beating yourself up&#8221;, berating or criticising yourself<\/li><li>In those moments, intentionally decide how you would prefer to speak to yourself (imagine you were a loved family member, what might you say?)<\/li><li>Positive self-talk is an intentional practice that you can get better at over time with a consistent awareness of the negative chatter in your mind and intentional decisions of how you wish to speak to yourself instead.<\/li><li>COACHING: If you want to permanently shift the negative self-talk then, <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/terezrijkenberg.com\/book-a-consultation\/\">book a free consultation with me here<\/a><\/strong>.<\/li><\/ol>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>In relationships, 25% more negative comments most likely leads to divorce.<\/p>\n<p>But what&#8217;s the percentage of negative self-talk in your head? Or are you on the way to a mental break-up?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":4124,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[38],"tags":[87,79,97,92,100,98,95,96],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v22.2 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Do you talk to yourself? 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